The Attic

just in case someone stumbles across this..

2010-03-29T23:43:00.000+10:30

...I have moved this blog (again) to the following address, and intent to update (semi)regularly. No longer just songs I have written either.

http://leviwhitworth.blogspot.com/

Winter I

2010-03-07T02:25:00.002+10:30

"Who are we?" she asked
"I do not know," I replied -
Frost held us as one
For some time, we sat...
Withering
Holding each other
Low morning clouds - and willow leaves
She asked me to speak
I could not...
My voice was like fog
And when light appeared
We knew that we were broken -
But saw only snow

To you, did this mean nothing?

2010-03-07T02:17:00.003+10:30

The cleansing process.

I’m sorry, “Philosoraptor” but I no longer have space for you. I need to make way for my newest influx of iPhone apps. “Typewar” looks promising, as does “Passage” – which I’ve read very positive things about.

It seems that every few months I go through this process where I remove the apps that I haven’t used recently, and replace them with new ones which I am yet to try out. This keeps it fresh – increases productivity, and most importantly, makes me happy. I now have seventy-two apps that I have downloaded, which are not present on my iPhone.

I wonder, what do they think of me? Am I rude to cast them away like the useless chunks of code that they are, or should I be more gentle with these loving creations?

After all, someone spent their immeasurable time and energy smoothing out the bumps in the user-interface; making tiny little adjustments; calculating physics engines... the list goes on. To me, should this mean nothing?

Who cares?
I’m gonna play Doodle Jump.

A Plethora Of Soliloquy

2009-11-06T03:38:00.007+10:30

Her idle hand
Will conflate upon our star,
Every man will shadow her radiance.
Steel, ice, and smoke.

Her lips will remember
rampant soft champagne,
lilting, they will embrace joylessly.

In her eyes
I will melt into marble or steam,
A velvet prisoner of the light.
Porcelain, blood and concrete.

Lifted by that wholesome, dark breath
as she glances lissomely at my heart,
eternity will come too soon.

She will tell me she's falling
And I will tell her I know how she feels,
She will know that I won't.
Truth, lies, and a bad taste in my mouth.

She will brood and I will gleam caramel
Her opulent cadence will collide with my catharsis,
A plethora of soliloquy.

I Heard You

2009-08-16T23:47:00.007+09:30

I heard you singing
Down by the crops
And I felt your voice
Raise the hairs on my arm
And as you turned
I hid beneath
The blades of grass
Grown up past our knees

Each day that winter
I saw you there
Of our rendezvous
You were unaware
Until you fell
And I saved your life
But I could not save you
A second time

You were my first love
And I was your last
And I left you there
Buried with my past
And as I prayed
And as I cried
I heard you say to me
"Goodbye"

I heard you singing
Down by the crops
And I saw your hair
In the swaying tree tops
And as I ran
To be by your side
You disappeared into
The night.

Hand me a Shovel...

2009-08-09T16:41:00.010+09:30

Press your fragile frame against me
Say my name
And we'll both go down
In a blaze of broken hearts
We can waste the hours making
Paper planes
and burn them to the ground
and collect the blistered parts

Press your fragile frame against me
State your plans
And I'll write them down
And I'll memorize their tone
We can waste the hours drawing
Diagrams
And label all the parts
With my name instead of bones

Give me something to believe...

Hold on to me
I need something to believe
That's bigger than I can be

And now's your chance
To kiss me when I least expect it
Now's your chance...

Hold on to me
I need something to believe
That's bigger than I can be.

Loving Me Please

2009-07-12T17:26:00.004+09:30

I'm breathing fire from my mouth
Like a Baskerville hound
And I'm waiting for the sun
To crash right down
If time was sold in ounces
I'd buy it by the pound
'Cuz I'm not making any progress
In leaps or bounds

I'm waiting for the end
Of this sad, sad scene
I'm sleeping with the dead
If you know what I mean
I'm waiting for the flag
Of an enemy's retreat
The last thing I wanna do
Is step on somebody's feet

Don't attempt
To command respect
When you, yourself
have none to give
I'm not sad to see you leaving
(But I'm sad to see you breathing)
Don't you hate me just enough?
Don't you hate me just enough?
Don't ever stop.

So now I'm trying and I'm lying
To get this done
I'm failing and you know
That its far from fun
If time was sold in ounces
I'd buy it by the tonne
Because I feel as if I missed
The starting gun

And still, I'm waiting for the end
of this sad scene
I'm sleeping with the dead
If you know what I mean
I'm tryin' to play the part
But I'm not that keen
I'm just trying to find a place
That I've not yet been

Don't ever stop.

And I can't say
Ther words to make this right
And I can't be
The one to tell you...

...It's alright now
Don't be afraid
Don't hide away

Oh, almighty God,
Enough, enough.

Past The Revelation

2009-07-09T00:15:00.005+09:30

Behold all your skin, like a dense heaven at noon.
Your breath in bends - fresh like the chamber in which it was held.
Cold times provoke more deep alterations, while fear takes away such luminous flames.
Sails are drowned in the sky like shadows of stars in the sea.
Curved friends ask in terror to be freed - unaware of the purpose for which they are criticized.

Silent new times begin - hidden behind the speech of those who have been blamed.

Somewhere in the distance, rain stings electric.
Somewhere after the end-bells toll I realise a passive wind lies before us, arching over ages.
This pencilled paradise breeds indifference; a sugary smoke you can't bottle up.
I kiss the shallow water - a marker they dare not drain.
Meanwhile, thunder stretches down in hairs like snow-souls in the night.

Behold all your skin, like a dense heaven at sundown.
Your breath in bends - fresh like the chamber in which it was held.

Understanding

2009-04-30T00:59:00.001+09:30

This is Father, empty as the set,
”This is my final Psalm” he says to me,
This is no revelation,
This is mother crying at the door,
This is her final child to leave,
This is no happy occasion,

This is brother crying in his cell,
”This is my final meal” he says to me,
This is his condemnation,
This is sister crying on her bed,
This is her final chance to leave,
And escape her situation,

Well it comes to pass,
It comes to pass and we’re all here,
Is there nothing we can do?
The water is rising,
And we’re drowning along with our friends in the ocean,
And nothing can fix all the thoughts that are broken,
Is it too late to turn around?
Is it too late to turn around?

And the birds in the trees do nothing but condemn,
And the look in her eyes said she needed a friend,
And I’m holding her hand but I can’t hear her breath,
And they’re all stepping back, as she takes off her dress,

Is there nothing we can do?

Well it comes to pass,
It comes to pass and we’re both here,
Is there nothing we can do?
The water is rising now,
And we’re drowning alone by ourselves in the ocean,
And nothing can fix all the thoughts that are broken,
Run away, run away from this place,

Well it comes to pass,
And she’s whispering,
All the secrets she’s never told,
Of all the things she doesn’t know,
Or control or understand,
And I know I can empathize,
’Cuz I’m just a man,
And i don’t understand,

I Shall Feel No Pain

2009-04-02T02:29:00.001+10:30

Here we go again,
Though it’s a long way home this time,
And as we rearrange,
I find it hard to keep you mine,

Show me now your face,
’Cuz that’s a look I can’t describe,
I shall feel no pain,
I find it hard to keep you,

Don’t trust me, don’t trust me,
I’ll only let you down again,

Humiliate me please,
I need to know how bad it’s gone,
Go ahead, blame me,
’Cuz it was my fault all along,

Don’t trust me, don’t trust me,
I’ll only let you down again,

Change

2009-03-22T01:23:00.001+10:30

My, how you’ve changed,
Ships will sink and land will rise,
You’ll never look the same way through my eyes,

My, how you’ve changed,
It’s a fickle thing, I know,
But I’ve got to find a way to let it show,

My, how you’ve changed,
Supermarkets lit by moon,
Would never be suspecting it’d be you,

My, how you’ve changed,
Alcoholics in cahoots,
And it’s all so sudden, all too very soon,

My, how you’ve changed,
Shadows can’t disguise the truth,
I’d never have expected this of you,

My, how you’ve changed,
Ships will sink and land will rise,
You’ll never look the same way through my eyes,

My, how you’ve changed,
It’s a fickle thing, I know,
But I’ve got to find a way to let it show,

It’s A Matter Of Priorities

2009-03-21T18:17:00.002+10:30

The boats on the water,
Light up like a lava-lamp,
We kneel at the edge of the river,
And smile for the photograph,

And the swans don’t care,
They just float around,
Waiting for the wind to change course,
And at night time when the sun goes down,
The trees will fall asleep,
They’ll fall asleep,

But I’ll be awake,
Waiting for the sleep to come,
Waiting for you to come back home,
’Cuz this city, even when it’s fast asleep,
Is the prettiest I’ve ever known,

But Judging from your tone,
You’ll be out of here,
Before I can say “I love…”
And from the look on your face,
You hate this place,
So I’ll just say goodbye again,

Was that your face among the crowd?
I can’t quite tell,
Was that your face among the crowd?
I can’t quite tell,

Where did you go to,
When you said you had to go?
Who did you run to,
When I didn’t say “Hello”?
Where did you fly to,
When you said you wouldn’t fly?
Where did you run to?
Oh, you know I don’t mean to pry,

But you’ve got to admit,
That your actions,
Were unusual – even for you,
(And you’ve got to admit)
You were subtle enough,
Even though I saw right through,
(And you’ve got to admit)
That you ended this,
Before it even began,
(And you’ve got to admit)
That communication is more important than
Those nights we spent,

When the boats on the water,
Lit up like lava lamps,
And we sat by the river,
And held each other’s hand,

Was that your face among the crowd?
I can’t quite tell,
Was that your face among the crowd?
I can’t quite tell…

The Festival State

2009-03-21T17:43:00.002+10:30

In this city
Everyone seems scared of the rain,
Umbrellas race to the train,
Fire trucks hide away.

But I
Embrace it like a long lost friend,
Who I may never see again,
Who’s name I can’t remember.

And the city washes away
All the troubles that I face
From day to day,
Today is my day.

In this city
The trees all sing “Come hither”
The bikes speed past the river,
The festivals deliver.

And I
Sit beneath a tree,
Draw whatever I see,
Embrace the falling leaves,

And these branches touch the ground
And the wind makes not a sound
As I look around,
Today is my day.
And the city washes away
All the troubles that I face
From day to day,
Today is my day.

Can you see what’s missing?

Heat Death

2009-01-03T16:52:00.000+10:30

Entropy has no hold on me,
I will warm you dear.
Hold me close, don’t fear my touch,
They can’t reach us here,

Lets forget all physics.
Let’s forget thermodynamics,
Who needs a second law to live?
Lets forget all physics.
Let’s forget thermodynamics,
Who needs a second law to live?

Far away, in distant space,
Can we all be free?
When the sun burns out at end,
Will you still love me?

Lets forget all physics.
Let’s forget thermodynamics,
Who needs a second law to live?
Lets forget all physics.
Let’s forget thermodynamics,
Who needs a second law to live?

And the kids are screaming “daddy, daddy”
Send them off to bed with a wink and a lie,
And the kids are screaming “daddy, daddy”
Send them off to bed saying “It’s alright”,
It’s alright.

‘Cuz you know that when the tree is turned,
to ash it can’t return to life in time,
And we ask these questions, find no answers,
What is yours turns into what is mine,
It’s alright.

And when energy is dissipated,
Space and time reduced to just a rhyme,
This machine continues contemplating,
Suddenly it answers with a sigh,
Let there be light.

Let there be light,
Let there be light.

When “I’m Sorry” Isn’t Good Enough

2008-12-13T17:00:00.002+10:30

Excuse me while I put
together the pieces,
Just let me have this one,
Pretend it’s your moment of weakness,

I look but I don’t think
like everyone else does,
If I could betray you,
I wouldn’t attempt to,

Let me have just this one
intentional moment of weakness,

And we pray underwater,
For all our hopes and dreams,
Most of which we’ll never see,
And we’ll live in this silence,
Dare we cross these lines?

Well I’ll cross them for you,

And we pray underwater,
And we’ll live in the sea,
And we’ll beg for forgiveness,
In all our wildest dreams,

And we’ll stare at the sunshine,
As it’s swayed by the waves,
And we’ll wish it were different,
And we’ll wish things would change,

Can you tell me your secrets?
Can you open your heart?
Can you drown while still breathing?
Can you tear us apart?

“History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.”

Sir Winston Churchill

Les Feuilles Mortes

2008-11-21T01:21:00.003+10:30

This is only a first draft, but I don’t think it’ll be changed much. Enjoy!

You should see these stars slowly torn apart,
You should see these stars.

Eloquence never got you anywhere.
Write all you like, no-one will hear.

Show me how to breathe,
Teach me how to sing,
Sing your songs to the Autumn Leaves,
(*Les Feuilles Mortes is French for literally ‘Dead Leaves’)

Eloquence never got you anywhere.
Write all you like, no-one will hear it,
Self-defence did not stop the consequence,
Sing along, to The Danse Macabre
(*The Danse Macabre is a classical piece of music by Camille Saint-Saëns)

What a beautiful night,
What a beautiful night for us,
What a beautiful night,
What a beautiful night for us,

Long live death and equality

“The folly of mistaking a paradox for a discovery, a metaphor for a proof, a torrent of verbiage for a spring of capital truths, and oneself for an oracle, is inborn in us.”

- Paul Valery

Martyrs Need Not Worship

2008-10-27T19:18:00.002+10:30

Hey darling
Where have you been?
I know you’ve been crying.

She walks down to the river
and holds her head in her hands.

Hey darling,
Why’ve you been crying?
I know you’ve been seeing
The spiders at night,
Up in the trees
Where they sleep
with the birds
and the bees
And I know that you’ve been aching
To see what we’ve been making.

She walks down to the river
and holds her head in her hands.
She stares into the water
and sees her reflection dance.

And It’s dancing for me
And it’s dancing for you
But it’s dancing for everyone else in the room
And it watches as I breathe…
And it all is coming back to me…

She crept down to the river to hold her head in her hands
In the light of the full moon she watched her reflection dance
She leapt into the water and felt her blood run cold
She destroyed everything in this world she could control

Breathe in, breathe out.

”Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome.”

-Isaac Asimov

Call Me Desire

2008-10-27T02:19:00.002+10:30

Some days I contemplate letting it just bleed out,
And then I think of her,
And my mood turns upside down,
And I just breathe out.

Call me Desire
Set me on fire with those eyes.
Call me Desire
Set me on fire with those eyes.

I like to think that I’m setting the stage for faith,
But then I come back down,
And I wonder what it means,
To believe these things,

Then the wind
Enters the room
Touching everything
With its clumsy fingers

Call me Desire
Set me on fire with those eyes.
Call me Desire
Set me on fire with those eyes.

Then the wind
Enters the room
Touching everything
With its clumsy fingers
And it throws the room about
Side to side…
And I’m waiting this out…
And it’s taking me so long to tell you…

Call me Desire
Set me on fire with those eyes.
Call me Desire
Set me on fire with those eyes.

On The Torrens’ Banks

2008-10-23T00:45:00.001+10:30

Why am I staring at the sun?
The river has all but dried up,
And here I stand,
Waiting for the night to come.

Can you hear me?
Can you hear me?

Sitting in the trees,
The birds will scatter,
In realization,
That we don’t matter,
Watch all you want,
We cannot change a thing.

Can you hear me?
Can you hear me?

I am the river and I am the swan,
Facing the end as I sing my song,
These ripples are destined to turn into waves,
But I won’t stand another day.

Dragonflies hover above,
The gondola man tries to summon love,
This building’s on fire,
There’s no one left to shove,

Close your eyes now,
Close your eyes now,

I am the river and I am the swan,
Facing the end as I sing my song,
These ripples are destined to turn into waves,
But I won’t stand another day.

And when this sun sets
We will hold our hands
And we’ll climb these steps
To the promised land
And as this moon rises
We’ll close our eyelids
And wait for silence
To let the light sit
Within our hands
Do you hear my voice?
In the promised land
We will have the choice
Do you carry burdens -
A price to pay?
On the Torrens’ banks I gave myself away.

They Remind Me Life Is Fragile

2008-10-23T00:27:00.003+10:30

Take me out,
Break me down and show me, love,
Just who you think you are.
Do you know,
Do you know just what it takes,
To show me what you call love,

Let’s pretend…
…Let’s pretend that we’re still friends…
Just for a day or two,
So confide,
Run and hide, just don’t be fooled,
It’s only for the weekend,

Don’t turn away,
Don’t close your heart,
Don’t leave too soon,
you won’t get far…

Chemical Girl

2008-09-22T01:32:00.001+09:30

Feel free to take my breath away,
And never give it back,
Is this some spell you made for me?
Or have you just changed tack?

Tell me, what was it like in Hull City?

Set light, ignite, the shadows play,
The wind takes you away,
Sit back, relax, another day
Awaits you on your weary way,

What was it like in Hull City, chemical girl?

Did your feet get tired?
Did the clock tick one two many times?
Did you kiss me softly,
Or did I make it up as I went along?
Keep telling myself that it’s gone,

Set light, ignite, the shadows play,
The wind takes you away again,
Sit back, relax, another day
Awaits you on your weary way,

What was it like in Hull City, chemical girl?

This Room

2008-09-08T03:04:00.001+09:30

This room shall not be graced by kings
Nor frolicked in by saints,
This room shall never see
The golden light of brand new days.

This room is not a grand one
But a humble little friend,
This room will soon decay
And turn to dust – But never bend.

This room is made of brick and stone
And rested in by fools,
This room will not be occupied
By gold or silver jewels.

This room is not a special place
To anyone but me,
This room is not significant,
It doesn’t mean a thing.

This room is not possessed by me,
I call it not my own,
This room is small – not big enough
For parties to be thrown.

This room is such a wondrous place,
Where everything feels right,
This room is where (not long ago)
You shared with me your night.

Fingertips

2008-08-17T16:38:00.008+09:30

I'll apologise now, because this didn't turn out
The way i thought that it would end,
and this look in my eyes,
is that of me pretending that I'm not
Completely and utterly surprised,
And I'm falling into older habits,

It's like wanting to play with an old burning flame,
But I don't want to burn my fingertips,
And it's not you it's me,
And I don't want to come across,
As if I'm being too extreme,

I'm falling into broken habits
I'm thinking things I haven't thought in years
And I'm sorry I'm not ready, But it's not the best of times,
And this is killing me,
Killing me to sleep tonight.

If you break it all down, well then I'm sure you'll find out,
That I'm a coward in this awkward way,
it's been a long time,
Since anyone has taken up this
empty space existing in my life,

I'm falling into broken habits
I'm thinking things I haven't thought in years
And I'm sorry I'm not ready, But it's not the best of times,
And this is killing me,
Killing me to sleep tonight.

I'll apologise now, because this didn't turn out
The way i thought that it would end,
and this look in my eyes,
is that of me pretending that I'm not
Completely and utterly surprised,

And I'm sorry I'm so scared to call,
Or let you know how much it means to me,
And the warning lights are flashing,
Unaware of people crashing,
Into broken signs of what we're s'posed to be,

Prove me wrong and take me home.

When Push Comes to Shove

2008-07-11T00:56:00.006+09:30

Don't worry about the mess you're making,
You're doing fine.
You don't have to understand
'You get what you give'
or the concept behind it.

Here, look and see all the people waiting,
You're running out of time,
And time is all we have,
It's everything and everything else,
Time is all we have.

The only thing that you can't own,
The only thing you can't control.

How can we expect freedom;
When we draw lines to keep ourselves in?
Our greatest ever creation,
Was our second original sin

Are you aching yet?
Is this what you want?
Do you feel me yet?
I'm practically choking in anticipation,

Are you waiting there?
Is this how it goes?
Is it cold out there?
I'm literally murdering my own creation,

The only thing that you can't own,
The only thing you can't control.

How does it feel?
How do you feel?
What should I feel?
What does it mean to feel in this reality?

What's going to happen now?
It's not easy,
Do you think you can mess with my head
In just the right way?

The only thing that you can't own,
The only thing you can't control,
And it's killing me.

(and this is how we repent)
Will someone remind me how to inhale?
My lungs appear to be broken.
And my mouth is dry, and my hands are numb,
And my fingers could do with provoking,

I'm searching for something that I can pretend,
Will never be audibly spoken,
And I think you'll find if search enough,
That my mind is so horribly open,

When push comes to shove,
I'll push you back,
But it won't be enough to counteract...
And the force is too much,
And we both know that,
But it's dark, and it's cold,
And I want to go home,
And I told you; a fact is a fact.

Emergency

2008-07-02T21:20:00.003+09:30

Flickering lights in emergency,
Mending what broke our intensity,
Can I see you, dear?
Even if just for a moment or two,

Voices return from the fear we hold,
Tearing away at this broken soul,
Can I kiss you, dear?
Holding my breath while pretending it's you.

Please Tell Me

2008-06-28T00:00:00.006+09:30

Sometimes I wonder
If I'm less of a man,
Because I can't grow a beard,

I try and I try
To shave to promote growth on my chin
But the hairs just don't appear,

It's been nineteen years, and these hairs won't grow,
There's so many things that I want to know,

Like why does it rain?
Why doesn't the sun always shine?
Why does the garbage man always leave my garbage behind?
Why don't my shoes ever match with my shirt?
And why can't I grow a beard?

Would you be so kind
As to lend me your chin
Because I can't grow a beard,

I just want some hair
to style as I please
But its hard to style when you're styling thin air,
There's nothing there....

It's been nineteen years, and these hairs won't grow,
There's so many things that I want to know, so please tell me,

Why does it rain?
Why doesn't the sun always shine?
Why does the garbage man always leave my garbage behind?
Why don't my socks ever match with my tie?
And why can't I grow a beard?
What's the meaning of life?
Where did I leave my keys?
Why am I not filthy stinking rich yet?
Can you open your eyes while you sneeze? is it possible? I heard it wasn't.
Why can't I recite pi to twelve decimal points?
Oh wait - yes I can, it's 3.14159 26535 89.

It's like I'm hyped up on estrogen. As if I'm popping estrogen pills.
But I'm not popping estrogen pills, I'm not even that high in estrogen - level wise.
Some people make jokes disguised as witty observations and then other people laugh and it annoys me slightly.

Why does it rain?
Why doesn't the sun always shine?
Why does the garbage man always leave my garbage behind?
Why don't my pants ever match with my hat?
And why can't I grow a beard?

(please tell me)

Hold Me Underwater

2008-05-29T00:31:00.003+09:30

Will you hold me underwater?
Will you set me free through murky stars,
And show me the way away?

Will you hold me underwater?
Will you turn me to face what is yet to come,
So that I am prepared?

Will you hold me underwater?
Will you find me my redemption,
As my sins are washed away?

Will you hold me underwater?
If I ask politely?
If I lie?
If I tell you everything?
If I beg?
If I hold my breath until my face turns blue?
Will you hold me underwater?

Roadtrip

2008-05-19T01:48:00.004+09:30

This is a relatively rough draft, but I like how I can somehow cram a heap of events into a song via obvious and not-so-obvious lines. I like it. This song's about two places, two songs, three or four people, four days and about fifteen different events.... exciting, no?

I feel I know your face,
But such a mystery - your name...
I'm sure I'd remember...

Oh, fuck I missed my window,
No time now left to show,
I'm more than attending,
I participate in the extreme.

Won't you turn?
Just a glance is all I ask,
But where are you now?

I've been so busy choosing songs,
And writing songs,
I watched you from the corner of my eye,
It's mine - this corner of the room,
I'll stay up late and every night,
I'll say your name, though not to you,
I'm wasting all my time,
As if I can't keep track of life,

Oh, Christ, I missed my window,
No time now left to show,
I'm more than just attending,

Won't you turn?
Just a glance is all I ask,
But where are you now?
Keep me warm,
This air is cold,
and no one knows I know where you are.

Is this a bad time?
The center of all issues is in the past - forgotten
Reminded in the quiet times,
But what the hell would I know anyway?
It's only been about a day,
Whichever way you see it,
It's a sign that it was mine.

Won't you turn?
Just a glance,
Is all I ask, but where are you now?
Keep me warm,
This air is cold,
and no one knows I know where you are.
Now's your turn,
You're right here,
And all the beer went to my head,
Keep me warm,
This room is cold,
And no one knows this couch is ours,

Awkwardness is a by-product of infatuation,
And I feel I should know your face,
But such a mystery is your name...
I'm sure I'd remember you...

Crete

2008-04-27T19:01:00.008+09:30

For the third and last time,
you're so ungrateful
and if we could fly,
well wouldn't that turn the tables?

From my language to my lungs,
You wake up underwater.
Well where now are your wings?

And I'd gladly lick clean,
The wounds upon your back,
Just before everything,
Turns to a watery black,

Just off the shores of Crete,
You wake up underwater.
Well where now are your wings?

From my language to my lungs,
The sky is surely open to us,
From my language to my lungs,
You cannot control the heavens above.

Erimus Pulchrum

2008-04-21T23:49:00.002+09:30

We will be beautiful.

We will live our lives as lives should be lived,
We will love ourselves as we will each other.

We will be wonderful.

Nothing will matter. Nothing will need to change.
Nothing will hurt, and all will shine.

Te Quiero.

Write it down.
Say it.
Hear it.
But do not dare understand it.
For with understanding comes the destruction of it's beauty.
Assuming you don't agree.

We will be alone together.

We will sleep In the light of each other.
We will know everything of our hopes and dreams and fears and knowledge.
For to know knowledge in its purity is to know nothing and to love everything.
I love everything.

Ti Amo.

Don't write it down.
Don't say it.
Don't hear it.
Understand it and feel it.
For with understanding comes the vision of it's beauty.
Assuming you agree.

And when all the languages blend into the same one,
Everything we ever wanted and loved will be beautiful;

We will be beautiful.

Inertia

2008-04-21T23:12:00.001+09:30

At this point, I understand how we fall in love.

When "Can I have this dance?"
Equates to "Can I have this crash?"
The metal shells collide above the asphalt.

Bitumen is scattered with bits of men,
And the bodies collapse into one another.

At this point apologies don't mean a thing.

The opposing metals embrace
in a hardened exchange of paint scrapings.
and everything we wished was true becomes reality.

When we wake in the morning,
both of our cars will be gone,

At this point, our cars become one and the same.

The road becomes the dance floor,
And our cars become our bodies.

Our car becomes our body.

We burst into flames,
As our car falls in love.

Our love becomes our flame.

At this point apologies don't mean a thing.

Moon

2008-04-21T22:28:00.001+09:30

Christ, I hate how I’m so cerebral
I hate it but it’s true
And if you think I’m leaving,
you’re mistaken too.

As your hand
Makes its perfect circles
Over those damn keys
I watch you, and I know
This time, I can’t do anything,

The motor runs,
The radio
is playing static on repeat,
the rear-view mirror
won’t stop moving,
Along to your heartbeat,
and if you think I’m gonna wait here...

And as your hand
Makes its perfect circles
Over those damn keys
I watch you, and I know
This time, I can’t do anything,
And if I could change the world,
I’d change it for the best,
I’d heal you,
And your past would never
Hurt you again,

Let it go,
It’s so cold outside,
You have to tell me,
Let it go,
In the dark of night,
there’s no one else to
let me know,
Let it go.

Two Inches Every Second (Touch)

2008-04-21T22:27:00.002+09:30

As the Cherry Blossoms bloom
and the petals fall, we follow suit.

When the snow begins to fall
and the roads fog up, we follow suit.
(touch me)

The maximum length of the waves of light that my eye responds to is equal to 700 nm.

The distance between our lips
is approximately
7,142,857 times the maximum length
of the waves of light
that my eye responds to.

Give or take 100nm.

Touch me
(then do the math)

I forgot how beautiful mornings are.
I forget how beautiful you are.
Care to remind me?
(touch)

As the Cherry Blossoms bloom
and they begin to sway, my heart follows suit.

When the snow begins to fall,
and the plants freeze in the cold, my heart follows suit.

In the early hours of the morning I wander.

(touch me hard)

In the early hours of the morning, I wonder:

What is existence without Touch?

Something Chronic

2008-04-21T22:27:00.001+09:30

Can you believe
the state I find myself in?
And it’s true what they say,
You learn something new every day.

And it’s something chronic when you’re falling
When you’re calling but there’s nobody receiving,
And it’s something chronic when I’m waiting,
Waiting for a sign that I know what I’m doing...

I’d hoped you’d think I’m better than what I am,
The existence of self confidence is up for debate,
and it’s true what they say,
An apple a day, keeps the doctor away

And it’s something chronic when you’re falling
When you’re sending but there’s nobody receiving,
And it’s something chronic when I’m waiting,
Waiting for a sign that I know what I’m doing...

The sky is falling down.

A Song About The End Of The World

2008-04-21T22:26:00.004+09:30

Let me in,
Something tells me the world’s about to end,
Shall we celebrate?

Let me in,
You’re so quiet since all of this began,
Sail away...
...before we go,

Hold your tongue,
All this violence is bringing me undone,
are you gonna join me?

Hold your tongue,
If they hear you, they’ll put an end to this fun,
Run away...
...before they come,

"This is all I have," she said.
And this is all we have.

Broken No Longer

2008-04-21T22:26:00.003+09:30

We walk alone
Through the shadows,
And over the bones of our brothers and our sisters

Battered and broken,
our strides step in time with our tears

And lo, we found
our own mountain
we know we must climb,
Plant our flags at the peak
Collapse as we weep for the fallen.

Battered and broken,
our strides step in time with our tears

We climbed the top of the mountain and cried,
"We're broken no longer"
Standing on top of the mountain we cry,
"We're broken no longer"

Hold On To Your Headdress

2008-04-21T22:26:00.001+09:30

And the bodies on the side of the street,
and the children waving flags as they march to the beat of the guns
And hold on to your head dress as the bullets are stained
with the blood of the men who protect what you love,

And the woman on the news report says,
"Did you hear about the man who fell down in the heat of the war?"
and the journalists have all-access passes
to witness the death and step into the war for an hour,

See the houses on the side of the road,
and their roofs have all collapsed as they bear all the weight of the grudges,
And blame and the hate, and the lack of compassion,
from us, who still have all the things that we love.

Underneath The Metaphors

2008-04-21T22:25:00.004+09:30

I never said a word I didn't mean,
And I'm finding it hard to believe
All the things I'm seeing.

Shoot me down in a blaze of glory
So I've got something I can keep
To inspire me in my sleep.

Hold on,
Was that a sideward glance you threw at me?
Hold on,
Well could that mean you're still in love with me?
Hold on,
Is there a chance that I might have a chance?
Or are you just playing me one last time?

I ask that you don't tell a soul,
But everything I do,
Is in one form or another,
A subliminal message for you,

And I don't want to say
That I miss you now,
But the thought won't go away.

Hold on,
Was that a sideward glance you threw at me?
Hold on,
Well could that mean you're still in love with me?
Hold on,
Is there a chance that I might have a chance?
Or are you just playing me one last time?

You could say
That I might like
To ruin every song
And make you think of me.

Underneath
all of the sneaky things
That I throw out for
everybody else to see

You could say
That I might like
to pull apart your thoughts
And analyze them deep

But don't you try
to make those damn excuses
That you have to go
'Cause you're so tired and alone

Because Underneath the metaphors I'm lonely.

Isn't The Morning Beautiful?

2008-04-21T22:25:00.001+09:30

Hallelujah, take off your clothes,
We found God behind the car park.
Let's pretend they'll never know,
We felt each other in the dark.

I have to go, I have to go,
You left without a kiss goodbye.
I have to go, I have to go,

And isn't the morning beautiful?
And don't you wish you weren't alone?
By yourself you'll see you've found nothing at all

Hallelujah, let me touch you,
We fought all night upon the floor,
Hallelujah – Do I know you?
You're not the one I knew before,

I have to go, I have to go,
You left without a kiss goodbye.
I have to go, I have to go,

And isn't the morning beautiful?
And don't you wish we were alone?
By yourself you'll see you've found nothing at all

Hallelujah, did the gravel hurt your knees?
Did you end up getting any sleep?
Did you spend the night awake?
Did you spend it contemplating fate?

I have to go, I have to go,
You left without a kiss goodbye.
I have to go, I have to go,

And isn't the morning beautiful?
And don't you wish we were alone?
By yourself you'll see you've found nothing at all

And isn't the morning beautiful?
I wish that we could be alone
By yourself you'll see you've found nothing at all
And isn't the morning beautiful?
And can you find your way back home?
By yourself you're all alone.

You're all alone

Sing With Me

2008-04-21T22:24:00.001+09:30

I swear to God, I could drown in those eyes,
and loose myself in between the lines.

I swear to God, I could drown in those eyes,
even though I know that I'll loose you in time.

I need you now like I needed you then
I've cut my hand on your eyelash again,

I need you now like I needed you then,
And we both know I don't want to offend.

The leaves that fall tell me stories untold,
Of how you sing in the blistering cold,

The leaves that fall tell me stories untrue,
Of how I don't want to sing with you.

Sing with me,
Sing me a song.

Bodies In Motion

2008-04-21T22:23:00.000+09:30

And the bodies in motion are slowly speeding through our heads,
and fleeting thoughts keep coming back moment by moment.
One at a time.

Breathe with me.
Let it be.

And the bodies in motion cannot be halted at this pace.
Their path is set in stone and now all is decided.
And you will be mine.

And you can't explain - and no, you can't go back.
The moment's gone, and now the heart attack is coming down on you like nothing else,
because you're missing everything you took for granted.
Let it be, don't try to make things better.
Don't try to make those memories come back to life.
The sweat builds. The tempo increases. Can you feel it?
I can see it in your eyes.

Can you hear what I'm thinking now?

One More Summer

2008-04-21T22:22:00.000+09:30

Wake up sleepy-head
And prepare for re-entry
into the atmosphere

We took each other far away
and shared some thoughts
We both agreed to disagree
and never re-appear

This is living.

And so long, my dear
Bid farewell to heaven's hold.
It's all I know.

We made amends with those we lost
We carry on and worry not
We've sewn the seeds,
the fruit it brings grows bitter by the year

Outside the birds are singing to themselves,
and I can hear you breathing for someone else.
(outside of sanity I'm sleeping)

Wake up sleepy-head
and prepare for re-entry

Guttermouth

2008-04-21T22:21:00.000+09:30

The paper says:
If there was one single moment
I had to choose,
Above all others,
It'd be you
Lying on my bed.
So beautiful and perfect.
Soaked in the warm light
Of the television.

Wrapped up in my sheets,
as my heart skips multiple beats,
Which (if you know me) Is unusual,
Because I keep time so well.
And I remember in your eyes,
You were trying to disguise
A look that said "I'm yours"
Which I would kill to see again.
In anyone.

And it's a shame, but I don't know her any more.
It's far too late to tell her all the things that I forgot,
The words that fill the gutter,
The sentences that disappear into the noise of the crowd.

The somethings that hide in the newly-formed wrinkles,
Where my fingers join my hands.
I love you so much, and I know this change of status
Is the last thing I need.

This distance is killing me and I can't even feel it,
I'm numb while you're oblivious,
Yet you watch my every move and the irony is killing me
Faster than her words ever could,

All the things you should have known.
All the things you should have known.
All the things you should have known.
All the things you should have known.

I Am The Illusion

2008-04-21T22:20:00.000+09:30

And I propose a toast,
To those of us who have nothing.
Hold them high.
And through the window pane
The light turns to an awkward shade

Your words turned to sand in my mouth and in my heart
And your theories were somewhat sub-par
And your face used to be more beautiful

So I put forward this suggestion
just to help you out.
Don't let go.
'Cause somebody in your position
Simply can't afford
Not to know.

Your words turned to sand in my mouth and in my heart
And your theories were somewhat sub-par
And your face is much prettier when it's inside my head
And your words used to be more elegant than that.

What's the point?
If history repeats its self,
It's all been said and done.
What's the point?
These people can't control themselves,
I am the illusion.

Your words turned to sand in my mouth and in my heart
And your theories were somewhat sub-par
And your face is much prettier when it's inside my head
And your words used to be more elegant than that.

Jaws Of Life

2008-04-21T22:18:00.002+09:30

Pretend you can't hear me.
In just a moment the inertia will smash your pretty face
Against the dashboard.
And the motor will run as the stop sign collapses
under the weight of the metal shell.
Did I mention that it's designed to save us?
If the fall doesn't kill us then these flames will.

Is that the sound of the wheels still spinning or the petrol spilling out?
Falling slowly through the air
Landing softly on the ground
And isn't it pretty as the metal bends
bending us along with it
Can we dance inside this wreckage?
Or are you pinned against your seat?

I'm glad we missed the tree.
But what a pity that the driver was all over the place
before he hit us.
And the windscreen will shatter and dance all around us
and pull the red out from in your face.
Did you hear as my back was splintered softly?
If it soon doesn't kill me then these flames will.

Can I have this crash?

Oh how I regretted hanging that decoration from the rear-view mirror as it lacerated your neck.
Apologies don't mean a thing.
You'll never hear me say
another word into your face
You won't be well enough to hear it
And I won't be alive to say it...

Can I have this crash?

Let's dance along to the sirens heard behind us
Here to save your life
I'll dance along to the sirens heard behind us
Here to save your life

Is that the sound of the paramedics screaming as they save you just in time?
Tearing up the passenger door
Before they even see the fire
And isn't it ironic how you cut yourself - yet it's you who'll live.
I'll dance alone inside this wreckage
Apologies don't mean a thing.

11432102 (Your Call)

2008-04-21T22:00:00.001+09:30

I'll admit, it's killing me,
That you won't even criticise me when I ask you,
But more to the point, or lack thereof,
I want to feel you near me,

Let's have a serious, very in depth,
Highly uncontroversial conversation,
Or let's just stop and get some sleep,
Or lets just crawl into a hole,
And hide away from everything we know,
So that we never die,

It's your call,

And your face might be red,
And your hands might be sharp,
Like the words on the floor,
And the words in my heart,
And your face might be red,
And your muscles all taut,
But a fact is a fact,

I agree.

I'll admit, it's killing me,
That you're asleep in your own bed without me,
But more painful still is the mood you're in,
Or the fact that I'm sleepy,

Let's have a pitiful waste of our time,
A highly inconceivable lack of feeling,
Or let's just talk, and sort things out,
Or lets just let it all go on,
Or disappear for one of us at least,
One is better than none,

It's your call,

'You're here: it's close enough,'
You said,
But you're not here, and I'm so lost.